I try to help people realize that change can start small, but the necessary ingredient is the realization that "your desire to change must be greater than your desire to stay the same." Socrates once said, "the secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not fighting the old, but on building the new."
Here is a recipe for change:
- Determine your desired goal, why is change necessary?
- Create a list of simple and achievable changes that lead to the desired goal. Then focus on one change at a time.
- Find someone who can help with accountability and support when change fights back.
- Focus on the benefit of the change and not on the difficulty of the change. There is a misconception that positive change should be easy but rather any type of change is accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts because change challenges what is expected from past experience. There may be people in your life who do not support your change because it challenges their own need for change. Remember to focus on your own desired goal.
- Finally, focus all of your energy in letting go of the past and building new experiences. Change what is changeable, accept what is unchangeable and remove yourself from what is unacceptable.